Genres: Horror, Supernatural
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Jack and Jill had a tough childhood. After Jack passed on, Jill fended for herself.
Jill, married and with children of her own now, deals with the nightmares that plague and torment her. She’s never been able to get over or deal with what happened to her.
Her husband has tried to be supportive, but she knows he doesn’t really understand the effect the abuse has had on her. Her attitude is barely tolerable and she begins to distance herself and it’s taking a toll on her family life.
While the topic of this story is an emotion-evoking one, I didn’t really feel like the characters were acting in accordance with someone who is ready to flip out, someone who is being ignored by their mother, someone who is constantly being snapped on, someone who is carrying all the weight, and so on. Yes, Jill was angry with her husband, but did it really fit the situation?
Her attitude really stopped me from forming any real empathy toward her or what she suffered through.
I also felt like some things were conveniently said or done to help the story stay its course.
Some issues I had with the story:
1. If she’s been acting this way since day one, why are they now having problems and why has he stayed with her?
2. Yes, words came out of their mouths/onto the page, but I wasn’t feeling any real anguish or heartache.
3. The whole scene with visiting her dad…WTF.
4. The ending was also messed up for me because he kept begging, yet he never said who he was with.
5. He wanted to tell her who he was with earlier, but she said no. Why would she not just go and ask him near the end.
6. The pacing. It felt like it was going somewhere explosive, but yet it never did.
This was a good short story. Nothing more, nothing less.